It’s common practice for me to warn my readers when I intend on tackling a subject that may potentially make them cringe. Some of the things that happen to me I want to write about without boundaries and this has boundaries but less of them. So if me taking about things of a sexual and personal nature make you want to be sick then stop reading now, this is your ONLY warning.
I need to issue a TMI warning here. I sent off for some @TheyFitCondoms last night. I may write a blog post on how they are. Stay tuned..
— Chris Lock (@catharsisjelly) July 9, 2014
I can honestly say that I have never (up until now) felt the need to or found a reason to measure the size of my penis. Yes it’s a weird way to start a blog piece but there is a reason behind it. Everybody knows that people tend to exaggerate “That fish that I caught was this big”. There is no doubt that if you asked a man on the internet how big his penis is I think a fair amount would be able to tell you the truth and a fair amount would lie. There is probably something linked to pornography to give a man such a complex about such things and therefore they go onto the internet and look at how to make things bigger. But this is not what this post is about. I have been put into a position that has forced me somewhat to take more of an interest in this subject with my own body. I assure you that this is not to prove that I am bigger or smaller than the any other guy; but for my own personal benefit. Confused? Allow me to explain.
I have always had a bit of an issue wearing a condom. This probably puts me in a pot with the majority of men, but how many of those men are willing to talk about it and more importantly do something about it. Now we all know that condoms provide a very good form of protection against pregnancy and sexual diseases. My problems with them start with knowing when is the right moment to stop what your doing and put one on. The other problems are more physical; which include being painful because of my sensitivity, overly tight and can cause embarrassing situations which can totally kill a mood. Putting them on is tricky business even at the best of times and if you have a sexy moment going on, it can really break that moment while my fingers try to cope with the task.
I have tried a few different brands of condoms but there really are way too many to choose from but a few nights ago I discovered TheyFit.co.uk. I had read about custom size condoms a while ago and thought I really must investigate more when I get the chance. You may remember that in my last post I said I was dating? Well with dating eventually I guess sexual things may happen and if it does happen I may as well be comfortable and confident.
How does this work I hear you ask? Actually what I hear is Chris can you stop talking about this now. The answer to that is most certainly “no”, look get over it. People have sex, if my parents never did then I would not be here so thanks to them for getting it on. Let’s face it the quicker you all start to accept that things happen in bedrooms/bathrooms/cupboards or any other place then the less awkward and more educational the rest of this post might be for you.
What you do is head on over to their website and try to order their ‘FitKit’. They had run out for me but then they do supply a Fit Kit PDF that you can download, print out, cut out and use; so I did that.
As you can see from the first photo what you do is hold the measuring stick at the base and recall the letter at the tip. Then as the second photo demonstrates wrap the device around the widest part, overlapping the two sections and reading off the number that is presented to you. If you put these two together e.g. M77 then this is the size you tell TheyFit. You can get a 50% discount on your first order of 6 too if you fill in the form on the website and even pay with Paypal which made the actual payment quick and secure.
The product arrived in just two days, free delivery and in an unmarked padded envelope to ensure privacy was kept and my flatmates didn’t ask awkward questions. Although I probably would of actually told them what it’s all about. Sadly I won’t be giving you a detailed explanation of how things happened on first use but I will say that I was very impressed at how they felt. Putting them on was a lot easier and a whole heap less painful and awkward than other brands. I shall leave you with a quote from someone also experiencing TheyFit for the first time, all be it on the receiving end.
Are you sure you put one on? – Anonymous
I was sure. Seriously guys, if you find the condoms on the high street don’t work for you vote with your wallet and get yourself measured up. You can include your lover/partner and make a fun evening out of it if you like. I have already sent off for some more and will say that I am probably not going to use anything else from here on in.
Disclaimer: I have not in any been paid by TheyFit to write this review, nor am I a friend of anyone within the company. Believe it or not I am just a consumer and when I feel passionate about something I tend to blog about it. If they offer me some kind of discount for writing it I will of course be wiling to accept *hint hint*
Update: After writing this TheyFit were actually kind enough to give me a full refund for my purchases just for writing this review. I’d like to formally thank them for this, the company have been very approachable and easy to deal with. Also as part of their scheme they gave me a referral link that gives anyone who uses it 50% off their first pack and me a £1 kickback so feel free to use it.