“Normal” life

You may of found that this blog has gone a bit quiet? Well it’s hard to keep it full of exciting content when my every day tasks at the moment are mostly getting up for work, going to work, working, coming home from work, eating, and relaxing. Dare I say that life has returned to some sort of normality?

Well no, not quite. Normality has something to do with my life and I may of mentioned that it’s actually not a bad thing for me to go through this routine right now. For me it’s a way to make money with a view to putting that money to good use at some point in the near future with another trip or two. I may really enjoy travelling but while people are willing to pay me and help me put my bank account in some kind of comfort I am going to take full advantage of the fact.

It’s been now 5 months since I moved away from London for this job and I really don’t have any regrets. I still visit the big smoke (about once a month) and always try to meet as many people as I can when I do so but there really is no way I would be willing to commute for what would be two hours every day. I know a lot of people do that but these are people with roots and while I still have very few off these I may as well move closer. So yes life has found some form of normality but that does not by any sense mean that I have reverted back to my old self, started to get depressed, self destructive or any of those other things that used to plague me. They are still with me I know that much but every time something happens that would usually trigger my anxiety I feel like I control it or in fact the anxiety that used to be there is no longer there.

I continue to push my boundaries though. I have recently done the first open mic session since I was in Melbourne and I forget (like I did last time) how much I actually enjoy doing this. My aim now is to work on the routine a bit more, this time it felt a little rushed, I was nervous of course I was but I need to practice a bit more, film myself and analyse it a bit more. Maybe put up some of the effort on the inter webs for criticism, I know I still have not done that radio show I was talking about and I still want to do it, just need to find the right feeling for it. I have had several attempts at it and nothing has felt right as yet. This is where my own criticism gets in the way, I know what I should do is put out more of the stuff I think is rubbish so that it can become better but the act of doing so always fills me with dread.

As well as pushing my boundaries in this way I have set myself yet another challenge and one that is currently proving to be very interesting indeed. I am actively dating… Yes this is something I never thought I would actually write or even write about. It would be incredibly rude of me to go into a mass of detail but let’s just say out of the three ‘dates’ I have been on with three different ladies only one was a total disaster, and one is actually going really well and that is all the gossip I am willing to hand over in this particular blog. There is a post that is totally related to this in my head that needs to be written and I am a little afraid of writing it but I may do it someday, like all those hundred of other things I keep meaning to do. Long live procrastination.

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